Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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