APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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