ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
