Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
