trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
