i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
