well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
