Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
we should paint friendship bongs
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