You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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