alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Randomize
