Please, let me fuck your mom
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Randomize
