wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
