I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Less talking, more tequila
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
