new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
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