Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
