Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
