Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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