I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
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