awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
