Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
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