Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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