how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
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