You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
