HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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