Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
