She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize