Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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