We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
