Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
We don't watch enough power rangers
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize