I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
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