when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
