to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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