he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize