5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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