i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize