So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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