Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Randomize
