Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize