shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
