I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I have fence marks all over my body
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
