office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
