He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
