is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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