I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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