Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
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i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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