just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize