I want to stick my p in your. b.
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
