worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize