So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
The adults are the big ones right?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
