i barfeds in our rink
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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