Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
