If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Blood and glitter go together right?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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